Sukaina Walji

Like a baby feeling the itch to move forward for the first time. Not knowing where, nor how to do it but, that I must, somehow, on hands and knees push, forward. At first the effort, physically and mentally is exhausting. Doubts creep in. I will never be able to do this, I am no good, I am fooling myself. It is much easier to lie placidly, on my back, legs licking in the air, cooing contendently. Still the human urge inside propels me to try again. I crawl forward, one tiny shuffle, a hand moves, then knees and then with just enough strength the second hand, until I collapse again. The power of movement, the feeling of euphoria is enough to galvanise, I try again. And again. It becomes easier, I reach across to where I want to be and to my delight, on hands and knees, I shuffle across, speeding up. The euphoria, sometimes too heady, results in a bruised head and scraped knees, once a tumble off a bed onto a hard floor. There is no turning back now, hands and knees itch to get going, crawling rapidly now with bottom up in the air until the urge to lift and stand takes over. I lift my eyes up, from the level of the floor, and look skywards.

By monthliesblog Posted in Uncategorized Tagged

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